Hearts and Nerves
by regulus has a sense of humor
Summary: You're sleeping with my sister?" Szayel has a new fraccion, Nnoitra's sister! And... drumroll please... Las Noches has an illegal... bar...? Szayel/OC, Nnoitra/Tesla, Grimmjow/Ulquiorra, Aizen/Gin, Starrk/Harribel, and maybe Tousen/Wonderweiss...?


_A/N: I couldn't wait… so here's my Arrancar OC fic! _

**Hearts and Nerves **

Chapter One: Not Gonna Be Your Sex Toy

_Shit. _She threw back the sheets. She had ten minutes to eat, get dressed, and get her ass down to the meeting room of Las Noches. Aizen had been very clear about the time and place of their meeting. And she was going to be _late. Late. _Gods, did she hate her life.

_Screw breakfast, _she thought, pulling on her skirt and tying the obi sash. Only seven minutes left. There was no way in Hueco Mundo she was getting there on time even if she did sonído, which she had no intention of doing. Adjusting the neckline on her shirt, she slid into her vest and threw her necklace over her neck, pulling her hair out so it fell down to the middle of her back. She didn't look _too _bad. She put her boots on and… _where the fuck had she put her sword?!_ What would her brother say if he knew she had misplaced her sword?! On the day of an important meeting?! Lost her fucking sword?! She didn't go anywhere without it! She was _so _dead. She turned to go, and saw it resting against the wall, where she had put it last night. _Oh for the love of… I'm loosing my touch…_ ramming it through her belt, she looked at the clock. Two minutes. "_Fuck!" _she yelled and ran down the hall.

* * *

"I'm glad you decided to heed my request and attend this private meeting Szayel."

"I really had no choice in the matter, you called me here… it's not as if I could have refused your invitation."

"Touché." The silence was killing him. He had an important experiment that he needed to finish and if his fracción were left to their own devices for too long… No. He didn't want to think about his precious lab being blown to bits by his retarded fracción. If only they had some sense of the common variety… or looked relatively normal. That would be nice.

"Do you have any idea why you were called here?"

"Not in the slightest."

"Well you're-"

The doors at the end of the hall burst open to reveal a panting Arrancar, her chest heaving with every breath she took. "S…sorry... I'm late... Ai…Aizen-sama…" she gasped.

Szayel rolled his eyes. She was just 5' 4" and looked to be about 80 pounds, he garnet red hair fell down to the middle of her back and contrasted sharply with her light amethyst eyes. Her uniform consisted of a black shirt, whose sleeves only came to her elbows, covered with a white vest with a collar outlined in black. She wore small silver hoop earrings, a thick silver chain necklace around her neck, and the v-neck on her shirt flaunted a fair amount of cleavage. Her white skirt fell to mid-thigh and her sword was stuck through her obi sash. The black and white boots of the Arrancar uniform disappeared under her skirt. Was he jealous? Yes, because she didn't have to wear glasses… and she didn't look like a slut despite what she was wearing. Very few Arrancar he knew could pull that off.

Aizen motioned for her to approach, and she obliged. Upon coming closer, Szayel noticed that her left eye was clouded over with a translucent milky film, he wondered if she could she out of it. He knew he shouldn't be too curious, but the scientist in him took over. "Can you see out of your left eye?"

Aizen looked at him kind of funny, but the girl responded, "Yes, I can see, but not very well. Definitely not as well as my other eye…" she looked him straight in the eye, "probably worse than you."

"I see…" he chose to ignore the comment about his glasses.

"Was that a pun?" she was glaring at him… it was kind of uncanny… like he'd seen amethyst eyes glaring at him like that…

"…"

"Okay," Aizen said breaking the awkward silence. "Szayel, this is your new fracción, Neko Jiruga." The name sounded awfully familiar, but he just chalked it up to the fact that he was well read. Aizen almost sighed, but caught himself, "I've noticed how much," purposely placed, well-staged cough, "work you've been doing lately, and decided that you needed some help in the lab, so I got you a… erm…" damn this was awkward,"… _more knowledgeable _fracción as opposed to, er…" it just kept getting more and more awkward by the minute.

"The retards I have now?" Szayel supplied with a straight face. He sounded bored.

"Aizen-sama," Gin. Great. Just great…

"Yes Gin?" Aizen sounded almost afraid. He _did_ have reason to be though, seeing as Gin had been unusually horny the past couple days and Aizen had been forced to do him. Not that he didn't like it, because he did… but couldn't he get a break every two hours at least?!

"You and I both know that's not the only reason…"

"And what's the other reason Gin?"

"Because Szayel is lacking in… certain areas…" Gin looked him up and down suggestively. Szayel cheeks were dusted with a light pink flush. Neko muttered something that sounded like, "when hell freezes over…" Gin had now walked over to stand next to Aizen, who looked like he wanted to run for his life. "She's all yours Granz…" he said suggestively before pulling Aizen away.

"Well then…" she said, "contrary to what foxface said, I am _not_ going to be your sex slave."

"I never asked you to." _The nerve of some people…._

"Well even if you _did_ I wouldn't do a damned thing with you."

Szayel narrowed his eyes. The one thing about having a normal looking fracción? They could think and do for themselves… in other words, they weren't mindless idiots. "Whatever." He turned around and walked out, expecting the bitch to follow him, which she did.

The sterile hallways were quite boring, so Szayel decided to take the long way through the Hall of Espadas… a.k.a. where the Espadas' resided when they had nothing else better to do. Kind of like an apartment of sorts. There were also funny corners all around the place… and Nnoitra Jiruga, the Quinta Espada, loved hiding in them and scaring the living shit out of anyone who walked past his hiding place. The Octava saw this as a test of sorts, to see how easily this one scared. Plus, it would be fun to see her scream…

They had just past the door with the gothic 5 painted on it and were approaching one of his favorite hiding spots. His long figure stepped out of the shadows, "I see you've got a new pet, Szayel…." He sneered. "Gonna play your part well kitty?"

The girl snorted. Was she high? It didn't seem like it… "What have I told you about calling me that _Nnoitra?" _Oh shit… no honorifics and a first name. Szayel new this wasn't going to last…

"You've told me not to call you cat, you never said anything about kitty, _Neko." _Was the pink haired scientist missing something? Since when was she on first name terms with the Quinta? And since when did the pervert know her name…? _Holy. Fucking. Shit. Pet names? They've… gross…. _Szayel mentally gagged and shuddered as these thoughts passed through his head. So the Quinta and his new fracción had fucked. What was wrong with that? Who _hadn't _the Quinta fucked? Was he jealous? No… he was pretty sure he was gay, so why should he care? He held no affections for Nnoitra, and didn't like women… so why was this…? Because it was awkward. That had to be it…

"Hehe… guess I'll be seeing you around then…"

"You bet your ass you will…"

"Come by my room later…" Nnoitra said. To Szayel that sounded highly suggestive, but Neko just replied with a simple "Sure," and they continued walking down the hall to the lab….

_A/N: Well? Did you put two-and-two together? _

_REVIEW!!!!!_


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